I have a question for Europeans. ¿Dónde está las bolas? Where are your balls? Donald Trump is out here humiliating Europe, and Europeans just humor him. Truly a people without honor or dignity. Europeans, once hench, are now just henchmen for the Americans. And they're being treated as comic relief, humiliated in public.

My beef isn't with European rulers, who are obvious morons, scrambling for their meal tickets at the colonial canteen. My beef is with the European people themselves. Where is your dignity? Where is your honor? Where are your balls, to use a gendered phrase for a gendered business?

Europe certainly has walkable cities. And an enviable quality of life if you have a million dollars. But honor? Dignity? Nations to be proud of? Europeons can't claim any of that at all. Besides all the historical atrocities, Europe has to suffer the indignity of being America's bitch in all the modern ones. Worse than being responsible for the genocide of Gaza and the cannibalizing of Ukraine and assorted atrocities in Africa, of course, Europe is not responsible. They're just there, doing it, like henchmen, without real agency or power. Europe was always just a fake, racist line across Asia, but now it's become obvious. These are fake-ass people who deserve nothing but contempt from the world.

I speak with so much vitriol because A) Sri Lankans have been colonized by Europeans for centuries and B) lectured to by them for decades. Europeans have been sanctimoniously telling us to practice democracy at gunpoint, but when it comes to overthrowing their own oppressors, they're awfully quiet about it. European democracy is apparently just for picking up the local garbage, while their actual masters trash them in public. Europeans are quite the craven colonizers now. They just want to live in the American Empire but with public services. They want to get taken on occasional murder tours of the Orient, keep their exploitation rights to Africa, maintain their money-laundering islands in the Caribbean, and go on lecture tours as the ‘good’ White people. By now all those vanities are being burned by a historical arsonist.

Trump has revealed the unspoken secret in White supremacy, that Europeans lost the plot last century, and are in the back with a toy steering wheel. Europeans went from being historical supervillians to mere sidekicks, and now America is kicking them to the side without ceremony. Europeans were never good people (it's just a racist line across Asia) but you could say they were brave once. They at least got on ships to cause hardship to other people. Now they just eat shit from their former colony and ask for more. It's an insult to hard-working imperialists to call Europeans imperialists anymore.

It's humiliating being a sidekick to a historical supervillain, but it's even more humiliating that Europeons don't seem to care. They have leaders with the combined approval rating of cancer and don't replace them. They have every tool for civil resistance built in and they don't use them. They just sit there civilly, while the ugliest American humiliates them. Europe just did another genocide and attacked Russia again and this time you can't even blame them. Europe is not a real continent and none of its countries are real nations. Europe is just the rump White Empire, getting publicly slapped by the current rulers, the Americans.

And for all their pontificating about what other people should do—protest, overthrow your oppressors, practice democracy—Europeans just sit there when oppression comes home. Europe at least resisted the Nazis for hours (Denmark), weeks (France), or years (UK). But then they got occupied by the people that inspired the Nazis, and have surrendered in World War III without a shot. Their leaders are just minding the shop, while the European people are on vacation. Mental vacation, physical vacation, genital vacation. Worse than having no metaphorical balls is not seeming to care about it at all. You can be an honorable person without balls, like women or Zheng He for example. But you can't be honorable without a sense of honor, and there isn't a whiff of it about Europeans. They're not even European anymore, they're Europeons now.