View large map here

For your kind reference, this is the latest SAARC map and insecurity regulations, per my knowledge. On point 9, however, it’s still not confirmed whether Friday is a holiday, but it damn well better be. Also, if you’re poor and living in shanties in the SAARC regions, please leave. We have a lovely mud pit in Grandpass for those delegates of poverty. Also if you work in Colombo, kindly fuck yourself, at home. And thank you for the bulletproof limousines. If you commute into Colombo, don’t. If you live by your daily wage, kindly fuck yourself on an empty stomach. Generally, the leadership of SAARC would like to see as few of the people of SAARC as possible, so please try to stay as far away as possible. Hikkaduwa has been designated as an IDP camp for the people of Colombo. We have posted men with guns every 20 meters to answer any questions.

Here’s the latest info I got in an email forward. I haven’t corrected the spelling or grammar at all. Any snark is in italics.

1. Starting 25/07/2008 vehicles and people entering the high security zone will be subjected to thorough security checks. (High security zone starts from Kollupitiya junction towards Galle face, Elephant house junction- slave island, York street ect…) vehicles entering the zone will need to obtain passes.

So no commerce in the commercial district

2. From 29/07/2008 no vehicles will be allowed to the high security zone at all. A shuttle service will be functioning for people to come in to the high security zone. (up to D.R. Wijewardena Mw- Lake House ) All vehicles will have to be parked out side the High security zone.

There are two shuttles. The Tamil/Journalist shuttle goes to Boosa

3. Train services will function only up to Bumbalapitiya from down south, and up to Maradana from the other side. Fort railway station will be closed.
There will be a shuttle service from Kollupitiya and Maradana to fort (up to D.R. Wijewardena Mw- Lake House ) No vehicles will be given authority to enter from there onwards.

Don’t come to Colombo

4. Bank will have to submit a formal request to obtain passes for the staff concern.(29/07/08 onwards) Requests should be made to the Fort police station. All details of staff whom passes are required should be provided in order to obtain same. All staff should have the bank ID with them. No staff will be allowed with out the office ID.

Own property and operate business in Colombo? Hey, guess what, fuck you.

5. A separate form requesting for details of each staff member will be given by the local police, for which we need to attach a photo of the staff member when handing over same. (separate investigation purposes by the PSD/ MSD/CID)

Any Tamils in there? These electoral rolls are a bit out of date

6. Cash courier vehicles/ Document courier vehicles need to obtain separate passes through their respective companies.

Please submit forms in triplicate for the TVMP and assorted paramilitary groups

7. Security personal attached to the branch should obtain approval through their organization.

A hug even

8. No NEW staff should be sent to the branch during this period. (25/07/2008 to 04/08/2008)

9. 1st of August (Friday) will be declared as a official holiday.

10. Other high security areas declared will be areas near the BIA / BMICH/ and MOUNT LAVINIA. (as some delegates will be located at Mt- Lavinia Hotel)

While we’re killing the commercial district, might as well mess up the entire city. Some delegates might want to see the beach

11. Period concern will be 25/07/2008 to 04/08/2008 (ending 4th mid night)

And by then the city will presumably stop bleeding time and money

Posted on Monday, July 28th, 2008 in Colombo, GoSL, International, Security, Sri Lanka.