Mahinda on Facebook, Mervyn on Nation
The conversation turned, as it eventually does, to Facebook. Rish T. Biscuits blinks hazedly like a satiated goat. She’s rather plussed that I have Mahinda and Uncle P listed as friends. Their conversations are also deeply hilarious. I’ve reproduced some threads here, which I hope won’t offend the honorable sirs too much. M and P have both really loosened up on Facebook, saying what they feel and discussing the problems of any financial and emotional relationship. Also, the Nation has been really killing it lately and I picked up a copy of their Mervy Silva interview. It’s been promoted with posters reading ‘My Porsche, My Problem’. The copy does not disappoint. All in all, the real world is getting funnier than Broken News even.
Mahinda and Big Poppa
Mahinda Rajapakse wrote
at 4:36pm on June 10th, 2007
Sorry men, damn supreme court is giving me some hassle, so I’ve had to bring back those chaps i sent to you. Give me a couple of weeks to appoint my brothers to supreme court and then I can start the evictions… sorry, freedom facilitations, again.
Velupillai Prabhakaran wrote
at 8:29am on June 9th, 2007
Thanks for evicting Tamils from Colombo. That has really helped me motivate my men, women and children. It has also done wonders to my cash flow. The contributions are streaming in. I’ll send you your cut next week.
Velupillai Prabhakaran wrote
at 7:20pm on June 3rd, 2007
How dare you insult Eelam’s first lady! Only I am allowed to do that. At least her dress sense is better than the pudding you are married to. Why don’t you get someone to sort out her makeup and wardrobe? She looks like a corpse most of the time.
As for my musto … maybe I will grow it back. My astrologer suggested I wait until 6.35 p.m. on 24th June before I start growing it back.
Mahinda Rajapakse wrote
at 12:13pm on June 2nd, 2007
Damn that woman and her shoes. BTW, I prefer you with the mustache, you should grow it back
Velupillai Prabhakaran wrote
at 8:11am on June 2nd, 2007
I am quite well. How are you doing? How much money have you and your brothers managed to plunder from your subjects in the south this week? How much are you going to send my way? I have been thinking of adding four more rooms to the bunker (Mathivathani’s shoe collection is getting out of hand) so a few million would come in handy. Give my love to Mr. 10%.
Mahinda Rajapakse wrote
at 4:38pm on May 31st, 2007
How how, uncle P?
Mahinda and Karuna
Mahinda Rajapakse wrote
at 4:39pm on June 10th, 2007
Adoh, I’m not sending my wife that way until I know for sure that you are ‘the man’ in those parts. From what I hear, your boy Piliyalan is now the big kahuna of that region. You had better sort that shit out, brother
Col. Karuna Amman wrote
at 12:33am on June 8th, 2007
Hello Mr. President. You still haven’t seen me this months money.. Also i sent two businessmen from Pottuvil… I asked for 20 mil for each guy.. If you want to re-negotiate let me know. By the way hows the wife? I heard she was suppose to come here for a idly dosai.. Let me know..
…
Also, in other stupid, I was having a Sen-Saal breakfast and Thimbirigasaya and got a copy of the Nation from the street news agent. They’ve been doing some hot shit lately, Mangala and Gotabaya in the past few weeks. This week it was a Mervyn Silva interview that I’d seen posters for all week. It does not disappoint. Here are a few key quotes:
This is one of my favorites. He says no one should take up arms and then talks about shooting people. Brilliant.
Q: You have said that if anyone supports the LTTE, you would personally shoot them. Did you mean it?
A: Yes. I say it even now. This country is for the Sinhalese, Tamils, Muslims and Burghers. Nobody can take up arms. If anyone took up arms, then we must oppose them. It is a shame that those who took up arms, even went to the extent of assassinating our own leaders. Even the police or, the armed forces, cannot do this on their own. We have identified a section of the Tamils who are directly supporting the LTTE. But, at the same time, there are Tamils who have aligned themselves with the Sinhalese. But, if anybody supported the LTTE or, attempts to destroy peace, I won’t go to the police to lodge an entry. Instead, I will kill them with my own pistol.
Also, his reasoning process is a wonder to watch. His colorful and accurate assessment of legal motive totally clears up the abduction implications for me. He is obviously faultless, given that is mother wasn’t a whore.
Q: You are implicated in the abductions that have taken place within the past few months. You have also been linked with Airman Nishantha Gajanayake who has been arrested in this connection. What is the truth?
A: I have learnt this only from you. No police, no newspaper, not any court or, even Parliament has mentioned this to me so far. I have no connection with him. I challenge anyone to prove this. I have a backbone and I am not afraid. The importance of a person cannot be judged by his wealth but, should be counted by the virtue of his parents. After all, I am convinced that my mother never slept with outsiders. What runs in my veins is my parents’ blood. I grew up drinking my mother’s milk. But, dirty blood runs in those who are involved in abductions. I am not that type.
Finally, like a good parent, his support for his sons extra-curricular and extra-judicial activities is heart-warming.
Q: Your son has been involved in several brawls even with the police. What corrective measures have you taken to discipline him?
A: Children have their own freedom. Up to a certain period, they are under our control. After this period, they decide on their own. If a child is hit by a parent, he/she can go to court. My wife never gave birth to Sidhartha or Mahoshada Panditha or Robbin Hood or Saradiel. We are from a normal family. I have two children – son and daughter. My son wants to enjoy like others, once a week. There are nightclubs and he has a right to go and enjoy himself. If someone confronts him, he has a right to respond according to his own conscience. On his birthday, there was a party. Police officers came and switched off the sound system and created trouble. My son reacted to this. And the country knows what happened after that. You see, today, my son will go to a nightclub and tomorrow he could even engage in meditation. So this is how children are, and this is how they grow. I will not try to hamper their growth in any way or, clip their wings.
Er, yes. I can’t tell what’s more hilarious, the real politicians or the fake ones.
This is a classic example of what happens when you send “Kassipu Gys” to the parliament,SB’s sons are same characters………they go to night clubs and fight with police,taking power from their fathers ……….we should shoot those who vote people like this
How can they build our country when they cant build their own sons characters
Great post indi…however i now fear for you after the Mervyn part… now i’m off to add Mahinda Mama, Uncle P and Karuna to FB…
Oh holy Christ. The facebook thing had me in stitches, but reading the Mervyn interview made my day.
“Q: There is also accusation that the UPFA has given money to the LTTE to win the presidential election. What is the truth behind this?
A: If this could be proved or if LTTE chief Prabhakaran admits this then we will ask Prabhakaran to take over the government. Now the deposed ministers are saying this because they did not receive from the government what they wanted. ”
I am not sure how to react any more.
Indi, this is the blog entry of the month! :-D
*gives white van award to Indi*
White Van Award! Lol. That is a good one.
Better keep an eye on this blog. The Nation might want an interview from Indi…
That’s Dr. Mervyn to you, Indi…doctor in what I know not…but apparently the retard is a doctor.
My favourite line in the interview:
Q: You were once a confidante of the former President. Now, you have become a close confidante of the present leader. Though President Kumaratunga is now sidelined, you have not shown any interest to talk about it. And this, people say, make you an opportunist? Your comment?
A: When I was in the UNP, I was close to Ranil Wickremesinghe. I have always been close to the leaders….
So…in effect yes….there are no adjectives to describe how dumb this man and his progeny are…
Indi presents his ignorance once again – poor guy. But this time it’s serious mud sliding – any idiot knows this is something created by indi. Indi has gone crazy – I’ll take evey step to get the government’s/CID’s attention to this. I think Indi lacks of something – that’s why he likes beer – may be belongs to Ranil’s club.
“that’s why he likes beer”
My God, will Indi’s inhuman terrorist anti-government anti-Sinhalese racist behaviour never cease? What WILL he do next? Claim that sex is normal?????
What does CJ mean — cunt juice maybe?
mud sliding? Sounds fun, especially if the ones doing the sliding are hot girls in bikinis…
I’m surprised he has only put one photo of himself..
If you didn’t guess already, I am behind both accounts. However, that’s not the first MR account. Search for his name on Facebook, and you’ll come across an account made before I did. Better profile too, but I thought to keep mine PC.
[...] President. This is not the first time Mahinda Rajapakse spoofs make an appearance on the web. Other bloggers have documented his appearances and he still has a dormant [...]