Ministry of WTF
All the douchebags in one place. Photo via Child of Twenty Five
I think Mahinda got confused by the term ‘cabinet shuffle’ and decided to increase the size to 52 (including himself). Kings, queens, and fucking jokers. Aside from the UNP effectively crumbling as an opposition party, this is terrible for the country in that it expands an already bloated and intractable bureaucracy. Mahinda is using Ministries as a short-term payoff, but in the any-term these Ministries make governance less efficient. More importantly, they are politically impossible for any coming leader to remove. These people all subsist at great cost to the public in Rupees and in time, and we now have multiple points of corruption. Not to mention the droves of violent Ministers sons now unleashed upon the public. In the interests of sheer fucking fantasy I have made a list of a few sensible Ministries, and the civil service posts that should sit underneath. Governance is not a prize for betrayal. It is a duty and a service, and Mahinda has corrupted it even further.
Revised Cabinet
Here’s the cabinet as I would structure it, with 13 Ministers, everything else being delegated to the civil service. I honestly don’t know how you can have a constructive meeting with 51 people. Just for reference, the new salary for all Ministers (Cabinet and Non-Cabinet) is Rs 65,000. This means that the new ministers (84 of them) costs Rs 5,460,000 a month. That is $54,600 a month, not to mention security, transport, etc, ad nauseum. Oh, and the corruption and graft. Under my system there’s a separate ministry for that.
Ministry of Health: currently Nimal Siripala de Silva – Minister of Healthcare and Nutrition
Minister of Indigenous Medicine – Tissa Karaliyadde
Ministry of Agriculture: Maithripala Sirisena – Minister of Agricultural Development & Agrarian Services Development
Minister of Supplementary Crops Development – R. M. Dharmadasa Banda
Minister of Plantation Industries – D. M. Jayaratne
Minister of Fisheries and Aquatic Resources – Felix Perera
Minister of Livestock Development – R. M. C. B. Rathnayake
Ministry of Education: Susil Premajayatha – Minister of Education
Minister of Vocational and Technical Training – Piyasena Gamage
Minister of Higher Education – (Prof) Wiswa Warnapala
Ministry of Graft: Minister of Land and Land Development – Jeewan Kumaranatunga
Minister of Housing and Common Amenities – Ferial Ashraff
Minister of Urban Development and Sacred Area Development – Dinesh Gunawardena
Minister of Public Estate Management & Development – Milroy Fernando
Minister of Water Supply and Drainage – A. L. M. Athaullah
Minister of Irrigation and Water Management – Chamal Rajapaksa
Minister of Construction and Engineering Services – Rajitha Senaratne
Minister of Resettlement and Disaster Relief Services – Abdul Risath Bathiyutheen
Ministry of Transport: Dullas Alahaperuma – Minister of Transport
Minister of Highways & Road Development – Jeyaraj Fernandopulle
Minister of Ports & Aviation – Mangala Samaraweera
Minister of Posts & Telecommunication – Rauff Hakeem
Ministry of Social Services: Douglas Devananda – Minister of Social Services and Social Welfare
Minister of Youth Empowerment and Socio Economic Development – Arumugam Thondaman
Minister of Community Development and Social Inequity Eradication – P.Chandrasekeran
Minister of Sports and Public Recreation – Gamini Lokuge
Minister of Cultural Affairs – Mahinda Yapa Abeywardena
Minister of National Heritage – Anura Bandaranaike
Minister of Child Development and Women’s Affairs – Sumedha Jayasena
Minister of Youth Affairs – Pavithra Wanniarachchi
Ministry of Foreign Trips: Rohitha Bogollagama – Minister of Foreign Affairs
Minister of Export Development & International Trade – G. L. Peiris
Minister of Tourism – Milinda Moragoda
Minister of Foreign Employment Promotion and Welfare – Keheliya Rambukwelle
Minister of Industrial Development – Kumara Welgama
Ministry of Blackouts and Petrol Queues:Minister of Power & Energy – John Seneviratne
Minister of Petroleum & Petroleum Resources Development – A. H. M. Fowzie
Minister of Science and Technology – Tissa Vitharana
Ministry of Industry: Bandula Gunawardena –Minister of Trade, Marketing Development, Cooperatives and Consumer Affairs
Minister of Labour and Manpower – Athauda Seneviratne
Minister of Rural Industries & Self-Employment Promotion – R. M. S. B. Navinne
Minister of Enterprise Development & Investment Promotion – Sarath Amunugama
Ministry of Public Masturbation: Karu Jayasuriya – Minister of Public Administration and Home Affairs
Prime Minister & Minister of Internal Administration – Ratnasiri Wickramanayake
Minister of Plan Implementation – P. Dayaratne
Minister of Parliamentary Affairs – M.H. Mohomed
Minister of Special Projects – Mahinda Wijesekera
Minister of Local Government and Provincial Councils – Janaka Bandara Tennekoon
Minister of Media and Information – Anura Priyadarshana Yapa
Ministry of Justice: Amarasiri Dodangoda – Justice
Minister of Constitutional Affairs & National Integration – D. E. W. Gunasekera
Minister of Disaster Management and Human Rights – Mahinda Samarasinghe
Ministry of Defence: Mahinda Rajapakse
Ministry of Finance: Mahinda Rajapakse
Mahinda with a Parliament is a like a monkey with a switchblade. He and his family have all the posts of any power, and everything else is just a pay off. Despite the high flown title, these are not public servants, they are public parasites. With 104 Ministers total, that means “1 minister for around 192,000 people. Those bastions of bureaucratic nightmares India and Pakistan on the other hand has one for every 14 million and one for every 10.5 million respectively. (Tiny Little Fractures). This is patently absurd. Mahinda needs to stop treating this nation as a piggy bank for himself (Helping Hambantota tsunami funds, personal billboards), his family (son given military scholarship reserved for accomplished officers), and his pursuit of power. He is playing hard and fast with the rule of law, the trust of the Sri Lankan people and my dwindling sanity. 104 Ministers? Are you fucking kidding me?
This is highly dubious. Miss Travel is a travel/social networking site that connects ‘Generous’ and ‘Attractive’ travelers. To, like, travel together, I guess. It all seems a bit like arranged prostitution and trafficking. This is part of a broader online trend to connect rich men to younger, attractive women. Sites like 
Sri Lankan domestics never say anything, they just stop coming. My maid just stopped coming and when I finally pressed her she said I needed to get a washing machine. I was hoping to ride this one out, but I’ve run out of underwear and I have no choice. I finally caved and bought a washing machine, from 
There’s nothing wrong with pornography, but there’s a lot wrong with porn. Nothing wrong with watching people have sex, but too often that sex is brutal, senseless and coerced. I mean how many couples are coming on each others faces every day? Hence, philosopher king Alain de Botton – after calling for a 
Sri Lanka is going to start offer 
Thanks for putting things in perspective.
Indi, this is a brilliant dissection of the state of Affairs facing the country today (specially taking the time to efficiently organize ministries !). It is a sad fact that there are no voices from Civil Society, private sector or concerned citizens, highlighting the injustice done to a once proud nation and its people. We have tolerated it for so long with our NATO (no action talk only) policies, that this is part of the fabric of Sri Lankan society. Where have all the NGO’s, INGO’s with all their donor money promoting good governance and accountability gone?? HRW (Human Rights Watch) should write about this one, coz this is not about petty graft, or giving the LTTE a smack on the hand for Child Soldiers, this about 19 Million People bloody people having to suffer under the rule of Jokers, who are about as useful as tits on a bull and will soon be at a theatre near you: Cirque De Soleil- ‘Handstands in the Paradise Island’. Guess people get the government they deserve. too fuckin bad.
Managed to get it down to 15 ministries here
Oh and btw, I don’t think that military school is for accomplished sailors. It’s for midshipmen.
Coming Soon with further crossovers
Ministry of Bloggers Affairs
Ministry of Cross Over Management
Ministry of One way traffic management
Ministry of Cabinet Reshuffle planning
Ministry of Further Cabinet Expansion
Saw the dissection. Let me cite two examples of bureaucracy, with the previous ministerail structure. During a mapping of ministries that are to do with Youth Employment, there were eight (8) ministries concerned, and during a mapping of ministires that are to do with Youth Reproductive Health, there were thirteen (13)!
And this is bad. Cos no one is willing to take responsibility for the subject. For the nation to function properly,
Ministry of Defence
Ministry of Finance
Ministry of Education
Ministry of Foreign Affairs
Ministry of Energy
Ministry of Agriculture
Ministry of Health
Ministry of Public Affairs & National Planning
Ministry of Development & Plan Implementation
Ministry of Women, Children & Youth Affiairs
Nothing on Culture, No Budda Sasana. If you see a problem, let the Ministry of Planning find a solution, and let the Ministry of Development and Plan Implementation be the implementing body.
Imagine, if Ma-Hinder had the brains to think simple? Too many cooks spoil the Soup Hodda, as the old lady would say…
The majority voted for this. Those who didn’t vote for this – tough luck. Campaign harder in 2011.
No – the majority didn’t vote for this, since it was not alluded to in the manifesto, or speeches.
you fool,
you think once voted in a candidate is only confined to the platform he/she ran on…
fool, you vote for someone you vote for what they stand for and you validate whatever they do
Literally, the majority didn’t vote for this. The new cabinet positions are for UNP crossovers, that being the party that lost the election. People voted for one government and they got one and a half. You can say that people voted for war or inflation or whatever, but they definitely didn’t vote for a partially UNP cabinet.
they voted for mahinda and whatever he chooses…
just like the 2nd bush election (he didn’t win the first)… they voted to continue the war…
you’re really naive kiddo…
you’ll learn when you’re older grasshopper…
The Bush analogy is completely and utterly flawed. The difference being that the American public knew his policy on the war. The Sri Lankan public didn’t know the policy on the size of the cabinet.
[...] Strong reactions to the expanding bus of ministers in Sri Lanka. Indi.ca says “Governance is not a prize for betrayal. It is a duty and a service, and Mahinda has corrupted it even further.”. LankaWatch comments “That’s a total of 104 parliamentarians now serving as the government of Sri Lanka. The question on everyone’s mind is with the increasing military budget and dwindling foreign investments, who pays for all these ministers’ security and luxuries.” Neha Viswanathan [...]
While Indi put things in perspective in no ambiguous terms, American Ninja, slightly more brutally and less popularly cites the unforgettable truth.
The saddest part is now that the UNP and the SLFP have seemingly merged into one giant incestuous group of kariyas (With the odd JVPer and JHUer thrown in for good measure) there is no opposition to speak of…Mahinda is free to continue his 101 Ways to Fuck Up a Country (sorry I meant Mahinda Chintana) with 104 fugly cheerleaders and nothing by way of debate or discussion…
This spiel is coming from Indi who was bootlicking the UNP and running around making their websites and hating on everybody else who wasn’t in the UNP camp during the Presidential elections. Then the voters pissed not only on the UNP and Ranil but also on Indi and every since, he’s had it out for anyone who doesn’t bend over to Ranil and his coterie of jackals. The UNP that Indi was screaming like a banshee about is now just a toilet bowl overflowing with effluent. One can only hope that the people flush it soon and put this pathetic party out of its misery.
Grishmeta mokak hari gaththa nang hondai, ethakota walla ochchara kassane naha.
Good on you Indi. All the voters are pissing on you. As they say – ‘when life gives you piss, make distilled water.’
The amount of buggers that resent you Indi, you must be doing something right.
Well it is gratifying to have seen the people piss both on Ranil and Indi. More gratifying to see the UNP falling to bits like a pack of cards. Indi backed the wrong horse and still cannot get over the fact that Ranil lost. Now crawl back under your belli mother’s [BEEP] and start licking, sophist. Anna honda lamayek.
You’re a pleasant chap aren’t you? Are you a deputy Minister by any chance?
I do not remember Indi “hating on everyone else” in the least. I find him fair, able to look at all sides of an argument and critically analyse the crux, and very bright- He might be young (thank god) which lends a naivete that is to be expected.
Best of all, he harbors no resentment, and does not carry any chips on his shoulders.
^ LMAO. What have you been smoking? BWAHAHAHAHA!!!!
Show us facts for your assertion.
You forgot the 19 deputy ministers – that makes a total of 104. Out of a Parliament of, what, 225? A freaking 46% of MPs are ministers? Forty-six percent??? Nearly half the freaking Parliament is in the Council of Ministers? Seriously, is this possibly a world record in percentage terms? Has someone written to the Guinness Book?
This mail from india- tamil nadu in particular. I am flabberghasted at the list of ministers. Incredible. In this case my city – a district capital should have 3 ministers.
We have our own jokers. But i wish we people have some say in calling back our representatives. Probably, if an electronic voting process is initiated, it will be cheap to conduct election and stop this charade of stupidity. I wish they take people seriously or send these fools to war zone. it is afterall people who are killed for the fun of politicians.
Blood is always red in any side of the divide.