this bird is trying to sassinate me

There’s a bird outside my window. Not a cute, pastoral bird – this is Alfred Hitchcock tapping on my window for hours and trying to kill me. He flies around and tries every window, over and over. I think he’s technically a humming bird, but I don’t think I could take him. Maybe with a tennis racket… On the weekend I wake up – with the birds – and go to take a shower. Whaddya know, the bathroom is toe deep in water. Thankfully the house is tilted and all the water is flooding my sisters room. The bidet pipe has come loose and I get hosed trying to fix it. Tha shuts off the main and weese spend the montag sweeping water out of Soob’s room. Last week the electricity was out for two days of the work week. I usually sit in front of the TV and watch professional wrestling while I work, but there’s none of that. I just want the government to keep the lights on and stop things from blowing up, that’s all. With the WiFi and power out I honestly don’t know what to do with my life. Go to Barefoot and use the WiFi under the trees.

My bus stop is near the giant government building Sethsiripaya. I can just imagine all the inefficiency filed atop desks like so much kindling. Every time I see it I have visions of it collapsing like a mob-era Vegas casino. At night they had a pirith chanting and kept my moms up all night. Buddhist’s trying to outshout the Muslims I guess. They like to use crappy crackly speakers to remind you of the samsara in life. The sound is like the giant clock radio on Satan’s bedside.

Getting off the bus, I saw a stray dog running down Main Street. It was in the middle of the lane, overtaking trishaws. I can respect that.

Posted on Wednesday, January 4th, 2006 in Sri Lanka.